Tuesday, January 20, 2009

My Evil Wonderful Sister(s)

I talked to my sister, Katie, the one who is getting married this fall :), and as everyone in my family does, she asked how my diet was going. It wasn't a comment made out of the blue, as usual, I was being self-disparaging with talk about how much weight I would need to lose before her wedding and she asked how I was doing with this task of losing weight.

Katie has always been a rock for me. She has been in such poor health lately that it is easy to forget all she has accomplished. She is extremely intelligent, kind, generous, and wise beyond her years. She is also a committed follower of Christ and has been my role model for years. As Katie and I were having this conversation, I could hear the underlying scolding- the disappointment that, yet again, I had failed to do what I said I would do and that, yet again, I was not living up to all I could be. Above all else, my family wants me to succeed and does everything in their power to make sure it happens.

Today, Katie wasn't listening to my usual round of excuses like, "Yeah, I'm doing okay," which is code for, "I was doing okay until I ate a full meal at Panda Express and a box of candy last night." Nor did she pay attention to my favorite excuse, "I just don't know which diet to do," which is really code for, "I just don't want to put forth the effort." Instead she urged forced me to start a diet, right now. She made me promise to start today, with whatever diet I chose and she told me how I was going to choose. I chose to put two different diets in the hat- both of which I believed that I could start and stick with, even if I didn't agree wholeheartedly with either of them. I chose eDiets (which is what I put meaning the standard, low-fat, American diet. No restrictions on processed foods or types of foods as long as they meet my caloric, and general health, needs) and Body By God which has a lot of good tips, but is a little less "normal" than eDiets but healthier on a long-term scale. Both names went into a bowl and though I would have preferred to pull out Body By God, I don't believe in mistakes, and I pulled out eDiets.

I have now committed to stay on this diet, even though I don't agree with everything in it, until Katie's wedding which hasn't been set yet, but will be sometime this summer. Enough time for me to apply myself and lose a significant amount of weight. When I feel like quitting and doing a different diet, I am to remind myself that I will be able to change diets after her wedding. I can't afford to do eDiets, and though I don't think I really need a plan, I am going to sign up for SparkPeople because it is free and they do much of what eDiets charges you $30 a month for. They use a points for reward system and you get a certain number of points for accomplishing tasks, like journalling, entering food into the food log or reading health articles. (If you read this post, check it out and decide to sign up, reference my user name "krankemommy" and I get some points!). I have seen the website before and thought it was really nicely done so I am headed back there for some direction and community.

I will be journalling here (and there) about my progress and doing weigh-ins and measurement posts too. Please post comments...that's what they are there for!!!

1 comment:

Mary said...

I am rooting for you!!! You can do this! You really, really can!! When you think you are going to cheat, tell yourself, "Just give it till tomorrow, or just give it another hour." Or go outside, even if it is just to stand on your front steps. Do not give up!

Giving up is FAILING.
You are not a failure!
Failure is not an option!
Don't give up!

*hugs!*